Ode to Wal-Mart Shopper


Oh, dear Wal-Mart shopper.
You went to the store
to put food in your hopper
But stumbled upon something more.

For I had been at that Wal-Mart too
Just about 10 minutes prior to you.
It was dark and drizzly and cold
And I lugged all the groceries I could hold
From out of the cart and into my car
But I missed the last cookie in the cookie jar.

For once I got home I realized my folly
And this I am sure has made you quite jolly.
For I noticed I didn't have one large box
And this is the part that really knocks.

I left that case of diapers under the cart
For I was tired and shopping too late at Wal-Mart.
I grabbed my keys and rushed back to the store
Only to find my cart empty once more.

I talked to the guy collecting the carts.
I talked to the greeter that's at all the Wal-Marts.
I talked to customer service too
But realized my diapers must be in Kalamazoo.

I needed those diapers, well at least Rachel did.
They cost $19.99, not quite a cheap bid.
I hope they serve you well, Wal-Mart guest
May you feel extra specially blessed.
But I can feel good that the case you stumbled upon
Was at least purchased with a $1.50 off coupon!

1 comment:

  1. Oh how FRUSTRATING is that? I like your spin though...that they blessed someone...